Being a plus size woman can bring a whole new set of challenges to online dating. As shallow as it might sound, appearances make the first and biggest impression in online dating and determine whether someone will swipe right or click on your profile.
Real Women Have Curves
You always have that nagging voice in the back of your head; am I pretty enough? Does this angle make me look too fat? Will everyone just pass on me if I put a full body shot of myself out there? The truth is, whether it’s traditional or online dating, there are always going to be people who will ignore you because of your weight, either because of their personal preferences or that they are simply too shallow to get past your weight. But with the rise of plus-size models like Tess Holliday and Ashley Graham, curvy ladies have role models to look up to for style and confidence.
You are Attractive
As a plus size woman myself, I have struggled with all these challenges first hand I first tried online dating when I was 18 and having spent 10 years in the game. I have learned many lessons along the way. And good news, I have met a lot of wonderful guys who liked my appearance as well as my personality.
The truth is, once you get the initial attraction out of the way, online dating is a wonderful way to get to know each other’s personalities and decide whether you actually want to meet up in person. At the end of the day, you should always remember that everyone, regardless of their weight, struggles with dating from time to time. Here are a few things I learned and some dating tips for plus sized women.
Represent Your True Self
When I first tried online dating, I was under the impression that I had to hide my size in order to get men to talk to me. I would find angels that made me look thinner and would only post selfies and no full body shots. I was very successful in the beginning and I was talking to a lot of men I actually found cute and attractive, and better yet, we had a lot of things in common. The problem came along when one the men I was talking to asked to meet me in person. I kept making up excuses because I simply did not want him to see that I was overweight.
When I finally caved in and we met in person, he rejected me almost immediately, telling me he preferred “shorter, petite women”. That experience taught me to never again misrepresent myself in photos and give potential dates the opportunity to disrespect me and my body. Cute selfies are amazing but it’s always a good idea to add a flattering body shot or two to your profile to weed out the people who would have a problem with your body type.
Don’t Make Everything About Your Weight
As women, it’s easy to make everything about our appearance and weight sometimes. Everyone is beautiful in their own way and there is more to you than your weight. If you feel healthy and good about yourself, you shouldn’t center everything around your weight. Accentuate your great personality and represent yourself with utmost confidence. Plenty of men don’t make a big deal of your weight until you do and confidence is sexy!
Accentuate Your Best Feature
Your curves are beautiful, so don’t be afraid to show a little skin and wear figure-hugging outfits or whatever makes you feel beautiful. If you’re looking for amazing plus size fashion, different brands such as Torrid, Fashion to Figure, Forever 21 and ASOS offer great and affordable selections online and in store. A good hairstyle can also transform and accentuate your facial features, and a confident smile goes a long way.
Overall, confidence is what makes or breaks that initial contact and the potential meetups, so have confidence in yourself and don’t let anything hold you back.