Let’s Talk Scotch

By David Montrose

Apr 09, 2018

I know that scotch is supposed to be a man drink and more fruity or vodka-based cocktails are more typical for women. Humor me for a while and let me propose this. There is nothing sexier than a woman enjoying 1 or 3 fingers of quality scotch straight up and actually liking it. This is some info that will surely impress your potential Sugar Daddy. Trust me – I am one. So with that being said, let’s talk scotch!

The Basics

So what exactly is scotch? At its basic level, it is just fermented barley, yeast, and water.  If it’s not from Scotland it’s not really Scotch. It’s whiskey. Although in certain states of the Union whiskey means more like a bourbon taste, i.e. sweeter rather than the smoky taste of Scotch.  So anyway, lets’ just stick to Scotch for now.

Scotch has to undergo a thorough aging process (3 years or more!) typically in oak casks and can be either single malt or blended.  When David was a young man (21 and over) he used to drink your regular scotch and coke. That is just a sin as we will find out later as screws up the taste. One bartender told me: ‘Hey man, that’s a drink my uncle would have’. That stopped me I my tracks and made me do a bit more research on this intriguing topic.  I found out that single malt is the epitome of good taste. It has to be made of malted barley from a single distillery, as opposed to mushing up Scotch from several different distilleries, which is what blended is.

Just a Taste

So how to drink and enjoy your single malt Scotch?  Bear in mind it is an acquired taste so you may have to start slow. Most sugar babies I have offered it to, take one quick sip, then made a funny face and never tried it again.  You don’t want to be one of those sugar babies. You want to show your sugar daddy that you are open minded, no?  So go ahead:  Order a ‘dram’ into a rock glass and sip it without any ice: Ice cubes make it colder and easier to drink but it also dilutes the smokiness which is what Scotch is all about, really.

Instructions for Enjoying

Bring the glass a couple of inches from your nose and take a breath from both nose and mouth. Depending on the brand you may notice a slight burning sensation. Do that a few times until you get used to it before drinking.  If you want, you can also add a splash of water which further open up the flavors of the Scotch. Now take the first sip or two.  If this is your first time you might be a bit surprised at the smokiness of it. It’s different than, say, vodka or gin.  Let it sit on your tongue and palate for 5 seconds before swallowing.  If need be, take a breather and do the whole thing again.  I assure you that your street cred with the older men you are with will go up two notches.  And that’s what you want, isn’t it?

You did it!