Have you ever had that moment when you felt you were “in too deep?” Maybe you found yourself in a sticky situation when your Daddy’s wife showed up unexpectedly. Or maybe you felt a rush of guilt when he was spending money he didn’t necessarily have just to please you. Here is my personal advice on sugaring with integrity. It’s always important to stay true to yourself while navigating the Sugar Bowl using your own Moral Compass.
Moral Ground v Scorched Earth
When first deciding to explore Sugaring it is likely you already have a few things in mind. Things such as an allowance amount, lifestyle expectation. As well as a list of qualifying characteristics and mannerisms that would make up your ideal Daddy. But have you considered your stance on Marital Status? Would you choose a Sugar Daddy who is married and looking to keep you a secret? My best advice is to be honest with yourself from the beginning and decide which type sugar arrangement you are comfortable signing up for.
Here are a few things to consider: Are okay with playing the role of “the other woman”? If your Sugar Daddy’s wife or partner does not know about you and later finds out, how many people would be affected? Could you potentially break up a family? Are children involved and how would they be impacted?
Integrity v Greed
You accept an allowance as well as gifts from your Sugar Daddy, but when does it become too much? Of course it is nice to be showered with expensive gifts. It make us feel appreciated. Having a level of awareness about your Sugar Daddy’s financial situation is the best way to know if he is overspending and putting himself in the red zone. Perhaps you are thinking, “Well, that’s his responsibility not mine.” and there is some truth to that.
However, I encourage you to consider the fact that if he cannot truly afford his spending habits, he will likely not be able to maintain the level of spoiling you have become accustomed to. This can set you both up for failure and disappointment as his spoiling you falls off causing financial problems for him. Additionally, the more he gives the more he is likely to expect in return whether it be your time, attention or other needs. I recommend asking yourself what is important to you, a quick gain or a sustainable arrangement? From an ethical standpoint are you doing fair business or have you taken a “whatever the market can bare ” approach?
If your Daddy becomes infatuated with you, he will want and need more and more from you. He will come to rely on you to be his feelings of happiness and fulfillment. This is a natural chemical reaction that he may or may not be aware is taking place. Let me explain. The PEA molecule sometimes called the “love molecule” releases dopamine into the brain when you experience
“falling in love.” Infatuation, lust and obsession can all cause the same chemical response leading to a sense of temporary euphoria. Just like any other drug the more you have, the more you need to maintain the same “high”. There is such a thing as a dopamine addiction. This can lead to risky business fast, especially when the feelings are not reciprocated.
Of course this can happen in any relationship where romantic feeling develop. However in Sugaring the rules are a little different. Be aware of signs of possessiveness and jealousy. Set up firm bounderies from the get go and know that you have the strength to say no to anything you do not feel comfortable doing.
Sugaring requires an established exit strategy should the arrangement become uncomfortable or unsafe.
Making a Mature Decision
By definition a Sugar Daddy / Sugar Baby arrangement is Mutually Beneficial. In my opinion that makes each partly responsible and accountable for the well being of the other. This has its limits of course, but as an adult you are responsible for making the decision to live by a certain moral code with defined values or to not. It is up to you Sugar.