My current Sugar Daddy is 20 years older than me. Despite the fact that I carry myself well and have, for the most part, always been mature and wise for my age (with a preference for older men to boot), I’d be lying if I said we didn’t get occasional looks and raised eyebrows. No matter how well- or conservatively-dressed I am, the looks are merely for the fact that there’s an age gap.
It used to really bother me, but now I simply brush Sugar Baby stares off with a smile. Sound familiar? Sound familiar? Read on for three tips on dealing with age disparity.
Focus on You
Really: concerns about other people’s opinions lie mostly in your own head. If you’re concerned about what onlookers think about your Sugar relationship, then the odds are likely that you care about what they think about. Insecurity will only hold you back if you let it. The more you accept and love yourself, the less important it is for you (or anyone) to abide by a status quo.
Remind Yourself Why
No, a Sugar relationship isn’t what most people would consider conventional—but if that’s what you wanted, then you wouldn’t be here. You entered into the Sugar World for a reason: out of curiosity; a way to supplement your lifestyle; for mentorship—or any other myriad option that can make the lifestyle attractive. Reminding yourself of the ‘why’ helps keep you in check with your decision. This is especially helpful when feeling the sting of a dirty glance sent across a crowded restaurant in your direction.
Discuss with Daddy
My Sugar Daddy sensed my discomfort with the cluck-clucks we got from a group of gossipy women upon arriving at a charity event, and asked what was wrong. While that wasn’t the right time or place to have a drawn-out discussion about how to handle detractors, the next day, we sat at a café and had a conversation about our feelings. That was regarding onlookers or anyone else with an opinion about whether our arrangement is “right” or not.
Getting on the same page helped solidify the feeling that we’re on the same team—and reminded me of how great he is, and all of the many things I admire about him. At the end of the day our relationship is something that’s mutually satisfying for both of us, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.