I had my first foray with the Sugar Life several years ago. It was a simple relationship that was fun, sure, but it became obvious very quickly that there was a lot of friction. To say we seriously struggled to be on the same page would be an understatement. And shortly thereafter I found myself in a new arrangement.
He was a giant-hearted, generous man that brought me quite a bit of joy with significantly less miscommunication. This is where my road to self reflection started. When my first Sugar Daddy and I got to know each other, I found I was forcing pretenses on myself in my effort to be what I thought he wanted. This one was different, upfront and honest about who he really was. His charming was disarming and I returned that to him in kind.
There it was… The issue with my first taste of Sugar was honesty. I was not being honest with myself and in turn with him. I quickly found that honesty is the best policy in arrangements.
Since that moment of personal enlightenment I noticed that the most successful Sugar relationships that I have had the privilege to be apart of (or personally know about) have revolved around honesty. Further highlighting how crucial honesty is to being prosperous within the Sugar Life.
Managing the Needs and Expectations
Let’s say you have piqued the interest of a Sugar Daddy. How much work are you going to put in to recognizing who he is, what he wants, and what he really needs? A real, worthwhile Sugar Daddy will be able to tell if you are just going through the motions, and simply waiting for a handout.
Maybe you are willing and able to put that work in. Now you discover that this man is quite the POT, but fear you may not be what he’s looking for. Don’t let that get in your way. Be honest about the time you’d be able to dedicate to him. Be honest about what your ideal situation would be. And most important of all, be true to who you are. If you try to change who you are each time you talk with a POT- you will wind up tripping yourself up, sounding disingenuous, and making yourself unhappy. This is supposed to make you both happy, don’t ever forget that!
Do You Know Your Worth?
I see a lot of wannabe Sugar Babies who feel they deserve high dollar allowances, who are constantly vocalizing their desire to receive pricey gifts in the crassest manner possible. All the while, these ‘wanna-babies’ simultaneously do nothing in the way of taking the necessary steps to be worth it. No one is entitled to anything in this life, so you really need to ask just how much time & effort are you willing to put into yourself? How you treat and care for yourself directly affects how you are treated. Basically, if you are going to treat yourself like you are worth salt- don’t be surprised if that is all you get in return.
Why the Sugar Life?
You should also figure out exactly why you are getting into the Sugar Bowl. Keep in mind that a lot of Sugar Daddies are not looking to ‘save’ anyone. Maybe they can help you reach a life goal, like graduating college? Sure! Traveling? Of course!
Figuring out why you’re seeking Sugar will help point you to your ideal POT. This is because no two Babies are alike. Recognize what separates you from the crowd and what makes you unique. Doing so will undoubtedly lead you to the most ideal arrangement (or arrangements!), granted you keep in mind that the Sugar Life is about give just as much as it is about take.
It is a delicate balance between fulfilling your expectations and theirs. Do too little? You might lose out on an amazingly beneficial experience. Do too much? You run the risk of what you’re bringing to the table taken for granted, leaving you feeling under appreciated.
Lastly, be aware of red flags! Never be so eager to snag a Sugar Daddy that you discount or disregard your gut feeling. Ignoring those can (best case scenario) waste your time you could’ve spent bonding with a different POT or (worst case scenario) you could find yourself in a very dangerous situation.
So, please do yourself a favor & learn something from my early struggles: if you are thinking of joining the Sugar life, then ask yourself if you can truly be honest. If you are struggling to succeed in Sugar, ask yourself if you are just struggling with honesty in yourself, your efforts, your approach, and your goals.