Home Sugar Support™ Forum Relationships He wants me to meet his wife..

This topic contains 4 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by SFwinefan SFwinefan 3 weeks, 1 day ago.

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  • #110219

    LanaDelRuski
    Participant

    Hey all, my current SD is in an open marriage. His wife dates other people and she knows that he dates other people as well. What she doesn’t know is that he sends money to the girls he dates, so he has to keep that part discreet. Today he asked me if I wanted to meet his wife and that really made me nervous. There is a 21 year age gap between us. I assume she isn’t an idiot and would quickly figure out that this is a sugar relationship, or make other assumptions about me. Especially since they have a daughter who is one year older then me. I told him I wasn’t comfortable meeting her just yet but I would consider it in the future.
    Does anyone here have experience in this sort of situation? Has anyone met their SD/SM spouse and if so, how did that go? I know he’ll revisit this question a few months from now and I want to be prepared if I do end up meeting her. He’s very respectful and won’t make me do anything I’m not comfortable with. However, he is supporting me financially so I want to make sure he is always happy, and if this is something that will make him happy, I might just have to do it.

    #110228
    SouthernSD
    SouthernSD
    Participant

    There is a few posts on here about SB meeting wives and at least one blog, do a search for them.
    With that said, I would hold off on meeting her. Even though he is in an open marriage, I believe you are correct in that she probably doesn’t know how young his girls are and that he is a SD. Keep telling him you are not comfortable at this time.

    #110232

    LanaDelRuski
    Participant

    @southernsd The blogs and posts I’ve found were about couples who were both open to sugaring. My SD made it very clear that his wife can’t know anything about the financial aspect to our relationship. My concern is that she’ll figure it out and i’ll be the reason his marriage is ruined. Even though this isn’t an affair because it’s an open marriage, it still feels like an affair because of this big secret we have to hide from her.

    #110242

    Siegfried
    Participant

    Not a good idea to meet his wife IMHO. I can think of many bad unintended consequences.

    #110261
    SFwinefan
    SFwinefan
    Participant

    I have two things that come to mind. First, you said he asked if your comfortable meeting her. It sounds like the obvious answer is no.

    Second, ask him why he wants you to meet her. That should allow you to cover your gets off he has a meaningful reason to have you meet.

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