Home Sugar Support™ Forum Fashion I look too alternative

This topic contains 8 replies, has 8 voices, and was last updated by SFwinefan SFwinefan 1 year ago.

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  • #28185

    GabrielleLilian
    Participant

    I am a super young newbie (wannabe) SB. But I haven’t had the gusto to post any pictures on my SA profile because while I guess I am stereotypically attractive I’m worried my haircut will be a major turn off as it’s fairly “alternative”. I have a short jaw length cut with bangs in a light purple colour (think sort of Ramona flowers from Scott Pilgrim but more pastel). I could go back to my natural colour which is a chocolate brown, and I have wanted to for a while but I’m worried the cut is still too edgy and makes me look a bit too young to be desirable. In most other ways my look is fairly girly but I guess I’m just wanting a little advice as to what to do with the do…

    #28188

    Well I’m pretty conservative because of my job & usually opt for looks that are more “appealing to the masses”.
    With that said… I secretly envy the girls with the edgy fun haircuts!

    SDs are not a one size fits all breed.
    These are men who all have different tastes & preferences. I’m sure there will be a gentleman who is looking for just your flavor.

    I’m not sure how edgy we are talking here so I would advise to find creative ways to make sure your look can be dressed up if say… he were to take you out for a fancy night on the town or a work cocktail party. If possible make sure you include those on your profile to show versatility & you should be golden!

    #28194
    DavidSD
    DavidSD
    Participant

    @princessprettyfrillybottoms is right. The goal isn’t to catch as many men as possible, its to reach the right man. It doesn’t do you any good to start conversations with a man who doesn’t like your hair and have him find out about it later and ghost you. That’s a waste of everyone’s time. Meanwhile you are out their appealing to the man who would like your hair, and you are missing out of tons of guys just because you have no picture at all.

    Don’t worry about being the best SB a SD wants. Be the best YOU that you can be, and see what SD that draws. He’s the one you want anyway.

    #28199
    ArtistinTexas
    ArtistinTexas
    Participant

    I don’t think you’ll have any problems! My profile picture when I first joined SA was a picture of me in full beauty makeup, which is very goth for me. Yes, I was a bit more dressed up, but I have my hair cut like Jensen Ackles and in that picture I had exaggerated winged eyeliner, darkish (mix of black and grey) smoky eyeshadow, and BLACK lipstick. I still got TONS of views and a few messages! And that was at the time the ONLY picture I had up. As long as the picture is cute/nice or whatever and flattering, you’ll be fine. There’s lots of people who trust more alternative looking people more first hand than more mainstream or conservative looking people as well. And don’t forget that having your awesome hair could be a conversation starter for someone! I know when I see cool coloured hair one of the first things I wonder is what they use to dye their hair.

    #28226
    SouthernSD
    SouthernSD
    Participant

    The alt look is a Niche market in the Sugar world. Keep in mind that most SD are conservative thinking and like to keep it down low and under the radar. If I take a SB to a nice upscale restaurant the Alt look will not fly.
    I’m sure there are a couple SD out there that like it, just may take a while.

    #28704

    GOMS
    Participant

    As usual, SouthernSD is correct. The way I would put it is that if your look is meant to get attention, that is going to negatively impact the discretion factor most SD desire. That said, I personally don’t mind the odd pixie haircut and koolaid colored hair. I despise tattoos and nose rings with a passion, but often find the unique/creative hair cute. Go figure. Now mind you, I won’t take Miss Koolaid to a fine restaurant; it’s Diners Drive-ins and Dives app for her. (They’re more enjoyable for me anyway.)

    #28915

    GabrielleLilian
    Participant

    Thanks I’m pretty new so the reassurance is nice and you are right it’s less of a issue than I thought.

    #39301

    TabbyCat
    Participant

    I think this might entirely depend on where you live. SouthernSD is (I take it?) a SOUTHERN SD. I used to live in Charleston, and I know I would have more trouble finding an SD if I were more alternative looking there (if they wanted to take me out on the town, anyway). However, I’m in LA, and a huge amount of the SD’s I’m encountering are in entertainment–which is a much more freewheeling bunch when it comes to style. My SD is in music on the business side, he’s in his 50’s, very well put together and styled, but he has far more tattoos than I do, and when we met he was wearing a fabulous purple jacket that would make Prince say, “Whoah.” So it really depends a lot on the industries your city was built on what the well-to-do men are into.

    #39325
    SFwinefan
    SFwinefan
    Participant

    @tabbycat – yes, you’re absolutely right and it’s good to reinforce that as a SB you’re looking for the SD who will be happy with you. However, the prior posters are right that it comes with a couple of caveats.

    First – it limits your pool of potential SDs – even somewhere like LA. You are proof that it is not a deal breaker, but there will be SDs who will not go for the look.

    Second – many areas unlike the big cities on the coasts will really make it impossible to find an SD with an overly alternative look.

    Heck, I’m in SF and the alternative look is not what I’m seeking or really open to in an SB.

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