Home Sugar Support™ Forum Relationships Polyamory, Self-Esteem, and being new to the Sugar Bowl

This topic contains 23 replies, has 9 voices, and was last updated by DogDaddy DogDaddy 4 months, 4 weeks ago.

Viewing 9 posts - 16 through 24 (of 24 total)
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  • #101708
    sexykoreanpear
    sexykoreanpear
    Participant

    This really got off topic and I find it interesting the ratio of participants who actually had advice/experience with the subject at hand vs folks who just came to snark? My apologies if I confused this space for a forum for folks to share their experiences and ask and provide advice?

    It’s ok not to know things, it’s ok admitting that, but lol @ referring to being familiar with the terminology of a long-existing subculture as “PC” or “American university derived.” Polyamory is not new, and any subculture has its own lingo, whether it be finance or kink or LGBTQ spaces or poly or the Sugar Bowl etc. That’s not a result of “PC culture” or the “American university”, that’s a result of groups forming the increasing their efficiency in dialogue.

    Not quite sure how this got off topic, but I’m uninterested if everyone is familiar or interested in the subject matter. A person associated my language with being a Millennial, the origin of the lingo is objectively not the result of Millennial folks, I provided a tongue in cheek response to a tongue in cheek comment…and provided a suggestion of where one could easily find clarification. Sorry if that impacted one’s anti-PC/anti-snowflake sensitivities 😂🙄🤷🏻‍♀️ Which, is pretty ironic…

    I digress though—have a great day everyone and feel free to conserve the energy if you’re unfamiliar with certain subject matter and just want to dish cheeky responses but can’t receive them gracefully ☺️✌🏼

    #101710
    teamswirl
    teamswirl
    Participant

    It’s funny because the men here do the most b*tching and complaining out of everyone here, yet everyone but them is a snowflake. Anyways, good luck in the Bowl @sexykoreanpear. I hope the ones that answered your question helped.

    #101711
    sexykoreanpear
    sexykoreanpear
    Participant

    Thanks @teamswirl — you literally read my mind and it almost always is the case that those most offended or defensive are the ones labeling other folks snowflakes xD I showed a few of my friends this whole feed and they were like “wait, these comments are so leftfield and general that they could literally be applied to any commentary or person sharing their experience or opinion and don’t engage with the original content whatsoever”…

    Anywhooooo, I have been able to connect with some dope polyam sugaring folks in the past few days in a few groups I follow and am part of via other mediums, so, I suppose any questions I have regarding that I’ll just keep to those spaces since 90% of this was just really uncalled for snark, sans any advice. Like, even the polyam folks in those spaces that *aren’t* in the sugar bowl (99% of them), were kind and shared some words of encouragement and advice that was more helpful than what this diverged into on a site focused on Sugaring culture and experiences…

    #101712
    teamswirl
    teamswirl
    Participant

    I would understand the snark if you asked a stupid question, but your question was legit. If you don’t understand a word, is the smartphone that you are on and Google it. That’s what I did. If you don’t care, why bother commenting. These are supposedly the ideal SD…

    I might look into some other forums as well. This one is so dead.

    • This reply was modified 5 months ago by teamswirl teamswirl.
    #101714
    sexykoreanpear
    sexykoreanpear
    Participant

    LOLLLLLL girl, preachhhhhh! So much energy spent being like “LOL IDK WUT U TALK ABOUT BUT ME MAKE SNARK COMMENT CUZ ME CLEVER”, like, 1. Google is free as f**k, and 2. What are you trying to accomplish? Be kind, be respectful, and keep it moving.

    I personally have never bragged about my lack of knowledge about something–I try to treat those as opportunities to learn something new, and if I’m not interested, I just keep rolling by–live and let live.

    When I showed a few friends this thread and told them that “these are the SDs who blog and comment on almost all of the threads who show up to events and are hailed as the ‘Dream Daddies'” they were shocked and asking me why I was entering Sugar Culture…and if this were my first or only experience with an SD I’d probably peace…but I’ve had some 2nd and 3rd dates with POTs this week who were all witty, respectful, and generous and are not the type who make it rain comments on here, so not all hope is lost xD

    TLDR: Don’t feed the trolls/Internet SD commenters are a non-representative sample of the SB/Don’t be a jerk

    Mini-rant over, back to our normal programming… 🙂

    #101715
    teamswirl
    teamswirl
    Participant

    Yeah. I have never met a SD or POT into the forums. They don’t like the men or women on any of them. You should stay though, I like you.

    #101721
    sexykoreanpear
    sexykoreanpear
    Participant

    Lolllll I wonder why… 🙄🤔😂

    But yay! Likewise ☺️❤️ I may to just be kind and encouraging to other n00bs since it seems that could benefit this space though 😂 #supportfellowSBs

    #101722
    valkyrium.tremens
    valkyrium.tremens
    Participant

    @sexykoreanpear!! seconding @teamswirl here: Please stay….!

    And FML, I did make a second long winded comment on this thread yesterday but it seems to have been lost 🙁

    #101752
    DogDaddy
    DogDaddy
    Participant

    @sexykoreanpear

    I’m a polyamourous SD who has had many SBs, both poly and mono. My own relationships have a heirarchy. Wifey is on top, then a mistress and then everyone else.

    Just remember compersion, as it’s at the center of successful polyamory.

    I’ve actually found that I don’t really have to compartmentalize things as long as I remember compersion. No matter how much I’m in love with someone, I’d rather see them happy with the option to see others than unhappy being tied down by me.

    This has let many women stay in my life where it wouldn’t have made sense if we were thinking monogamously. Several of my previous SBs and lovers will still text when they’re feeling like a date for old time’s sake. This is also a HUGE self esteem boost, because a gorgeous girl who can have anyone she wants is choosing to spend a night with me.

    So the sugar bowl is a great place for us polyamorous folk. You are better equipped than most in terms of communications skills and keeping an open mind. Good luck finding yourself a nice poly daddy.

    I also couldn’t agree with you more on the general snarkiness and worthlessness of most of the posts on this forum, but that’s just how public forums usually go, especially with a topic as charged as relationships. I like how you roped everyone back on topic.

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