Tagged: sex platonic
I am 19 and I am new to all of this. I am here because of my financial struggles as most women here I suppose. I imagined finding an arrangement of a good guy who I could spend an awsome time with but it seems like most guys here expect sex, which I do not want to have. It makes me feel like a prostitute to get paid for sex instead of my time. Do I need to have sex with the guys in order to be a sugar baby?
No, you don’t need to have sex in order to be a sugar baby. But you’ll have a hard time finding someone that wants to offer you an allowance just to talk and hang out together. I’m guessing somewhere less than 1% of the SDs here are looking for a platonic arrangement, and once a SB finds that unicorn, they hang onto him.
What you should be searching for here is ‘a good guy who you can spend an awesome time with’. A genuine relationship with someone that’s generous with their money because they can’t be generous with their time. Intimacy is just a part of most genuine adult relationships.
Most POT SD’s would have little challenge finding a lovely, articulate, and interested female companion for dinners, art exhibits, wine tasting and more. The sugar relationship provides a way to get to intimacy where neither party feels like they are taking advantage of the other or being taken advantage of. You will have a very hard time finding that unicorn, but also do not feel you every need to do something you are uncomfortable doing.
Just wondering what you’re offering that’s worth the $$ if not intimacy?
Not to say your value is tied up in your sexuality.. but if you’re being paid to just hang out with him, what’s he getting? Your company? You must be super super interesting or drop dead gorgeous.
This idea of platonic relationships, and this “why won’t they pay for my company only”, kind of suggests that these SDs are all creeps or ugly or weirdos who can’t get a woman’s attention, and thereby they should be happy to pay just for company or conversation. It’s really not the right mindset to enter into the sugar bowl with.
I agree with @josieforyou Coming from a guy perspective. It’s not that we only want the sex,but we are looking for a GF on the side thing and being intimate with someone is important to us. My SB i had for 2 years is a little older then you @lunardoll I am much older,but when we are together we are intimate. Just kissing is nice and she seems to be okay with the time and realized she would have to like me somewhat to be like that. The thing for you is first o find someone your attracted to,but if you don’t feel comfortable being intimate. Just move on to the next one. There will be some guys who are okay with that.
what if you went through early menopause?
1- you clearly CANNOT / SHOULD NOT tell any SD because he stopped having sex with his wife, ex, same aged partner precisely because older women experience “ vaginal dryness” and are perceived as “ unsexy”. so he would not want a SB who went through the same.
2- he will compare you to those ex partners and no longer perceive you as “ youth”: because menopause does not happen to youth.
3- best is keep quiet and go on HRT ( hormone replacment therapy) secretly
I need help about this topic.. I’m new here and it seems that all the SD that wrote me are interested in sex before sugar.. I mean… a prostitute should be paid in advance to avoid scam.. a SB how understand scam? I should receive something early than sex or just trust in my gut insticts?
Anyone that suggests gifting you an allowance at the end of the month, or even the end of the night, is out to scam you. SBs have much more to lose in this game, so you should always discuss, agree and receive any allowance before moving forward to sex and intimacy. For a new arrangement, that usually means receiving a proportion of a monthly allowance early on in a date where sex is expected. Cash in an envelope and hopefully giving you some time to discretely check the contents.
thank you. I may ask how much it should be the amount in the envelop? I know It is a thorny question but I’d like to know how much I can dream or be realistic…
Please review the “money” forum, this topic if oft discussed. Please don’t expect complete strangers on the internet to tell you the answer.
@kissmykinky, read through the forums. Remember, it is not easy to find an SD, you will find multiple references to women struggling to find someone who wants a sugar relationship and not a hook up.
I also suggest you review your profile for the vibe you are sending out. If your S name is anything like kissmykinky, you’re going to attract guys looking for the quick score … so to speak (like pumas on a steak).
Finally, your approach in your last question is just ripe for being interpreted for something one time/transactional. Most SD’s are looking for the relationship … and the balance of allowance, time out, travel, activities, etc. all go into it. Know what you want by way of balance on that and be able to communicate it.
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