In my previous blog, I covered the best practices for handling your allowance, like working with money transfers and how to receive a cash gift. But before getting ahead of ourselves, let me give you a little insight on approaching negotiations with some of my Sugar Daddy allowance secrets.
Some people are more confident than others with this discussion, but with the activity on the Advice forum I have noticed the intimidation factor from the Sugar Baby perspective can be high.
Let me try and quell your fears. I have been a Sugar Daddy close to five years and have encountered all variations of Sugar Babies, and the many approaches they have. Most know what they want and are able to verbalize it with me. Before the allowance conversation, you need to figure out what type of Sugar Baby you are so you can get the allowance you desire.
Pamper Me Baby
These Babies may have no particular allowance, gift or amount set. They are happy with gifts, money, loaded credit cards and being entertained with fine dining and upscale clubs.
Show Me the Money Baby
These Babies may have bills, tuition, student loans, or may be trying to save up to start their own business venture. While they love a new Prada bag, cash is what they need to succeed.
Take Me Places Baby
This Sugar Baby is similar to the “Pamper Me” type but seem to want to be more of a spoiled girlfriend or traveling partner. I have also found these Sugar Babies to be tired and frustrated of the dating scene in their own age group and just want to be taken care of.
This type of Sugar Baby may have specific stores she shops at and would like to be pampered with gifts from those places. They also are willing to travel with their Sugar Daddy whether it be a conference for work or a quick run to St. Lucia.
Once you have figured out which category you fall into, you can search for a matching Sugar Daddy and approach the allowance topic with confidence.
Asking for what you want can be intimidating, especially when dealing with successful businessmen that negotiate on a weekly basis. However, the whole idea of the Sugar life is an allowance based on generosity. Keep in mind an experienced SD will really have no problem with you asking, they are expecting it and sincerely want to know what you are looking for and how to best take care of you.
You should not go into it thinking there will be a hard negotiation or who can get the best deal, that is the wrong approach in the Sugar Bowl. As long as the two of you are in the same ballpark, be flexible, once the arrangement matures your Sugar Daddy will most likely increase your allowance.
Words to Live By
If you need a set allowance, be transparent about what you need and why. Here are some examples of exactly what to say to a Sugar Daddy.
“I really need to cover my monthly bills to free up money for tuition so (insert amount) would be perfect.”
“I am looking to have my monthly student loan paid at (insert amount).”
“If I had somewhere around (insert amount) this would completely free me of all my debt and I would be able to start saving for a future venture.”
Amounts should be consummate with what you know he can afford or the lifestyle expectation he selected on SeekingArrangement.
If you are using the “lifestyle expectation” guides on the profile, I would recommend you start somewhere in the middle of the range he has selected. i.e. He has moderate selected, do not start at an amount that might be too high. You will come across greedy or entitled. If he has flexible checked, you may have to work it a little to figure out the range he is willing to work with. In this case, good communication is essential to pick his brain before you sit at the negotiation table.
It is certainly a possibility that he will increase your allowance over time. Sugar Daddies like to know the relationship is established and that you are reliable. So once you show that you will not ghost on him or prove to be a rinser, he is more than likely to up the ante for you without even asking.
What if he will not commit to a number? If you are a “Pamper Me” type, you need to emphasize that you understand he is not an ATM but would like a certain lifestyle provided.
If you are an allowance type, you will need to come across firm but not sound snobbish or greedy. Let’s say as an example he wants to provide occasional assistance. You a can simply offer a range to start with. Something like this:
“Robert, I’m not expecting the highest amount right out of the box but I would appreciate somewhere between $1,200-$1,800 a month to start. This would cover my needs for the month and free up time for us.”
In the finance world there is an old adage. “Pigs get fed, Hogs get slaughtered.” That analogy can be used in many aspects of life, in other words do not be over demanding or you will find yourself without a Sugar Daddy. On the flip side do not be so complacent that you do not get fed. To win at the Sugar Bowl you need a good game plan, confidence and poise.