Transitioning communication from SeekingArrangement messaging to your cell phone or e-mail can be quite alarming. In trying to facilitate communication before meeting a POT in person, I have often ended up with an unsolicited collection of risque pictures. At first, I felt violated. How dare these POTs invade my privacy with X-rated content while I am in public, in class or at work? But, then I took a deep a breath and decided to use their exposure to my advantage. I reminded myself: attempt to understand their motivations before discarding the possibility altogether. Here is what I found out about some of these exhibitionists.
Not all these pictures are meant to be 100 percent sexual, I know it’s hard to believe, but give me a moment to explain. Some men are so out of touch on how to pique a woman’s interest that they think any attention is good. I met two interesting POTs who could be classified in this category. The first is this brilliant scientist in his late 20s. He published his PhD dissertation and his daily life was consumed with experiments, white papers and virtually no human interaction. He clearly didn’t know how to get a date and that’s exactly what he wanted – an activity partner – someone to enjoy things like dancing, movies, drinks and perhaps some intimacy. Instead of letting things progress naturally he thought the way to show his interest was to send explicit photos, I had to explain to him just how wrong he was.
This one is the picture collector who uses his own private parts picture as a bait; i.e. I showed you mine, now you show me yours! He may be sending that image to an entire roster of women. For him it is a numbers game. I used to think something about my profile was telling men that I wanted these explicit photos and the idea really bothered me because I am not that type of women, but I eventually realized this happens to women all over the world whether we want it or not.
Look how big it is. Look how I do amazing things with it. He thinks he is well above average. I had this POT constantly texting me ‘it’ in all sorts of angles. Because I was too uncomfortable to acknowledge, he mistook my silence as permission to continue blasting. I had the option of blocking him but confronted him instead. Once I did that, I understood he had more bark than bite. By showing my strong and assertive side, he backed off with lamenting words: But I thought you liked it…
This one POT had a trendy haircut, delicate facial features, a slender body and was quite a bit shorter than average. Apparently he sent explicit photos in order to show his “macho” side Meeting him in person was quite the opposite of what I stereotyped as a flasher personality. He proved to be the most chivalrous, reserved and respectful man I could imagine.
This is the confused man who has yet to understand that Sugar Babies aren’t escorts. It’s the type who sends messages like: I am visiting and staying at this hotel, could you meet me? I’d like to meet for lunch, can you host? Do you want to get this in a couple hours? How much do you charge? I put them in my block zone.
He sent me a picture of a fully sculpted athletic body with a grin on his face in full frontal nude. He knew that exposing himself pretty much guaranteed a follow through in his case. I asked for a video call (Facetime or skype) and clarified he would need to be clothed. During the call I asked if he could agree to pace himself so we could set up a first in-person platonic meeting. A week later he was waiting for me at the restaurant. I learned that he frequents clothing optional beaches and swinger’s clubs.
POTs who expose themselves all have their various reasons for doing so. It’s important for you to remember that if you aren’t comfortable receiving these types of images you need to speak up. No one has a right to make you feel uncomfortable and if the POT doesn’t understand your position it is time to hit the block button