When it comes to sugaring, the biggest factor when you’re first meeting is to make your POT feel at ease. After all, if he doesn’t feel at ease with you, it’s not going to go anywhere. And chances are you won’t feel at ease with the conversation. But, let’s face it, sometimes the conversation can be tough- and a POT’s don’t always know how to handle it. Sometimes, it’s up to the sugar baby to ease their POT into the conversation and take care of them. But, what can you suggest you talk about? Here are a few ideas.
This is an easy one. A lot of POTs work hard and do a lot of work. Ask them to explain it to you, and don’t be scared to admit if you don’t know much about the topic. Let them take the time to explain it to you and try to understand it. It’s amazing how a little detail can come back for you to bring up and will make them feel special.
What does your POT do for fun when they aren’t working? Get an idea for it, and if any of those are hobbies of yours (or you would like them to be) speak up! You might be able to find a second date in it.
Share a fun story
Did you recently have something funny happen to you? Or maybe you just got back from a trip. Share it! Even if you’re leading the conversation, it doesn’t have to be all about asking questions. Take charge and let your personality shine.
This also works the other way around. If they brought something up that you found interesting but didn’t have a chance to ask about right away, bring it back up. Ask for more details.
Ask about future plans
Did the week just start? Ask them about their goals for the week. Or maybe it’s almost the weekend, ask them if they have any plans. This is a great chance to find out about friends!
Keep the questions natural
Have you seen all the lists of questions you should ask on a first date? You know, the ones that suggest asking about childhood, debt, life trauma, and so on and so forth- on also, their favorite ice cream and their celeb crush.
Yeah, those can be great ideas sometimes and they can spark a great conversation, but there are some things you shouldn’t jump right into, and if the only thing you do is ask them question after question, it’s not going to feel natural- keep that in mind.
Everyone likes to talk about their pets, right?
They are a great topic, and even if your POT doesn’t have a pet, you can ask them what kind of pet they would like to have or what kind of pet they had growing up- and that is a great way to lead into the childhood talk.
Now, some of you might disagree with me, and that’s okay, but I’m a huge believer in having a basic ex-conversation right off the bat. You don’t need to ask for details and you don’t need to give any, but what was their last relationship like? How long ago did it end? What ended it? What is their baggage?
If you can start finding out what kind of baggage they have, you can start working around it.
What brought them to an SD site
It’s a valid thing to talk about. Why are they on there and what are they looking for? Some POT’s won’t be very eager to opening up about it because they will feel judged, but that’s okay. Let them know that you’re not going to push it, and open up to them about why you decided to try the site, let them feel comfortable around you by sharing that side of yourself.