Social media and the continued improvements in technology have giving people a lot of advantages and perks in regards to how we socialize. The one thing however, that remains a common thread that binds technology and how we socialize, is basic communication.
We’ve all been in situations where the interaction and chemistry between different people is great online, but then when it comes down to meeting face-to-face, there seems to be some awkward blunders. Sometimes you’re trying to understand his behavior, sometimes the conversation hits a lull. Below are some basic reminders on how to diffuse an awkward first Sugar date.
It’s All About That Smile
This first tip applies to literally anyone and everyone. Whether you’re a high-powered business- focused CEO, or a parent, teacher, or someone who works in customer service, your smile is the number one thing you can do to make someone feel at ease. It’s been scientifically proven over, and over again, the positive influence a genuinely warm smile can make. So when it comes down to your first date, keep in mind to show your best and brightest smile.
Even if you’re just as nervous, it’s a good thing to keep in mind, that your date is probably just as nervous as you are. So use those Crest strips, and show off your pearly-whites.
Flattery Goes a Long Way
So you’ve made it through the first introductions, and now you’re seated at a fabulous candle-lit table. You’ve already ordered your drinks, and now have some time before that waiter/waitress comes back to get your order of appetizers. Instead of fishing through your mind on what to talk about, get creative and start off with a compliment.
Your SD/SM is bound to look great regardless, but let him know that you appreciate their time and effort in putting their look together. You don’t have to go overboard, but keep it short and sweet. It’s guaranteed to make your SD/SM feel at ease.
Keep it Simple
Okay, so now the drinks are flowing, you and your SD/SM have gotten your food, and so far everything seems fine. Until, you come to a point in the conversation where you are way out of your comfort zone. As in, the conversation switches to current political topics that you might personally conflict with, or your SD/SM gets really intricate about the type of work they do. Don’t pretend to understand the topic(s), if you really aren’t sure.
Don’t stress about to find something “intelligent” to say. Your date knows you’re smart. You’ll just dig yourself into a hole, that’ll make things more awkward, when your date realizes you have no clue what you’re talking about. It’s completely okay to be honest with yourself, but most importantly with your date.
How to diffuse conversations that might seem a bit complex and tense is to simply ask facilitating questions: Do you mind further explaining/clarifying? I don’t know much about this topic/issue, what’s your take or stance? Giving the opportunity for your SD/SM to educate, and to inform, is not only a great way to see for yourself how they communicate, and how much they know about something, but it’s also extremely sexy.
Stay Classy and Keep it Cool
Unfortunately, even when you try your best, sometimes the chemistry just isn’t there. It’s always wise to never force a date into something that’s obviously not going to end well. However, that does not give anyone the entitlement to act rude, or mean, because things didn’t go their way.
If your SD/SM becomes brash in any manner, that’s a sure sign to reconsider things. Most importantly, as an SB, you always want to remain cool and calm. You never want to drop your own standards, and drop down to a negative level. Always be polite and courteous, and at the end, show that you’re the real winner regardless. Kill them with ‘thank you[s]’ and be kind.
Even if your SD/SM are having a bad day, or week, they’ll remember your kindness. Don’t sweat the big stuff. In the end, the minor things we tend to forget about, or take for granted, are the things that stand out the most.