Sugar Daddies Say The Darndest Things

By Malia

May 17, 2017

Some moments are so embarrassing, some people are so obnoxious and some triggers activate the runaway alert. Be that way at the beginning of a date and funny things are bound to happen. Indeed, in Sugar Lifestyle things tend to be quite open. Try to keep your sense of humor, go with the flow and really, and I mean *really* avoid making a scene. The name of Sugar Lifestyle is discretion. Easy going personalities are what we Sugar Babies need to have in our demeanor, so we can let our Potential Sugar Daddies feel comfortable and  just be, whoever and whatever they are. However weird they may be.


Grab Your Sugar Sisters

Triggered by this oddest things a Sugar Daddy has ever done in front of you thread in the Sugar Sister Forum, I was determined to have some fun by finding out more from friends.

So, the next time we gathered for wine and cocktails the comedy club started. Here is the fruit of this laborious process causing me a stomachache from laughing so hard. Pardon my happy mind as these are the ones I can remember after many quotes shared that night. Feel free to keep adding those awkward moments in the comments below, as you know some days all we need is a good laughter for inspiration.


Brunch Blusters

“Walked into a coffee shop to meet a POT, but there were two of them at the table.The POT introduces his high school aged son, and told her that he will be watching daddy to in order to become a real man.”

He went to the bathroom four times while they were having lunch, and took a while to return to the table each time.

He ordered drinks and after a few minutes of waiting he stood up and asked the Sugar Baby if there was a better place in the vicinity. She told him to follow her car for a mile. In the new bar, they ordered drinks. Five minutes after he stood up again asking for a third location.


Intense Introductions

He introduced himself as Dick. Nice to meet you Dick, she said. POT replied, All 9 inches, ready to meet you.

He brought up something that was definitely not shared with him and it was only their first in person meeting. Stalker alarm.

He asked if she wanted do things with him and his dog…in bed.


Neighborhood Deja Vu

After clearing up and agreeing on things following two platonic dates, he gives his home address. It is the house in front of her previous SD’s house.



Loser Lunch Dates

She notices his butt crack, hairy and no briefs, poking out of his pants as she walk back from the ladies room and he pays the dinner bill at McCormick & Schmick’s.

At Peet’s Coffee & Tea, he asks her if she likes threesomes. POT doesn’t realize how loud he speaks especially when his hearing aid batteries had just died.

He farted loudly at happy hour. Said excuse me, then continued talking shamelessly. Then took a sip of his beer and burped, excuse me again. Then he farted for the second and third time, all within 15 minutes of a meet and greet.


No Way, Valet!

He valets his car, and she walks out of the door straight to wait by the covered area of the restaurant. He calls her and asks for $12 cash to pay the attendant as he only had credit cards on him.


Tearful Goodbyes

She felt a gush and it was her period a week before due. She was wearing pastel colored skinny pants for a coffee meet & greet. So, she tried to drop her coffee to disguise the other stain and burned her POT’s arm.

“Let’s fuck sometime!” That was his bye at the end of a meet & greet.