Like a lot of things in life, there are stereotypes attached to Sugar. Upon joining SeekingArrangement with the hope of meeting nice, generous men, I was plagued with doubt and the negative opinions of others. This is what I call the Sugar stigma.
I knew people would call me slut, money-grabber, princess, and if they didn’t call me such, they were thinking it! I had to fight against these opinions to remind myself what I was looking for from the Sugar world- nothing immoral. I simply want to meet nice men who are generous, genuine gentlemen who will add to my life, and I to theirs. I must not let the opinions of others turn my interest in the Sugar World into something bad.
In today’s world, it is acceptable to go to a nightclub just to find someone to have sex with, but spending time talking to men online to see who you like the most just to merely meet them for dinner is seen as immoral. Talk about a double standard!
Undoing the Hate
There is such great stigma attached to the Sugar world because the it involves the two things that are most stigmatized in society; sex and money. People have negative views about the two and this will invariably affect you in some way. People will directly judge you, or you will indirectly sense their negativity because of your interest and involvement in Sugar.
The task is to undo this negativity, and remind yourself how this can be something positive and amazing. Try to stay focused on the task at hand. Give it time and be patient. Shut out the doubt and negativity. It may be an idea to network with other Sugar Babies so you don’t feel so alone and stigmatized. Only those in the sugar world can offer true advice and support be-cause they have more than likely experienced what you are experiencing.
One great question remains though; Why is there such resistance to the sugar world? I believe it is because of jealousy. Every sugar critic is green with envy. A Sugar Baby that meets a nice, respectful man has achieved something truly great, all while doing it on the agreed terms. Often those that strongly disagree with something actually desire it themselves, but they cannot cope with this so they protest and condemn it. A Sugar critic is probably someone who, for what ever reason, isn’t fulfilled by their partner, or they feel like they are the most moral of people and so it is their duty to ‘save’ you. Ridiculous, right?
You should know your intentions and expectations for the sugar world. This will help you focus on what you seek and prevent you from succumbing to the doubt and negativity of yourself and others. Also, be aware that many people may not agree with the Sugar world and their negativity may shape your Sugar experience, so you will probably need to detach from this negativity. Only you can decide if you are happy with what is being offered. Listen to your instincts, not the thoughts and opinions of others.
People are too quick to pass judgement and criticize these days. Ignore the critics and the haters and listen to your own inner voice. Do not be ashamed! Live YOUR life the way YOU want to!